Here today, Ore-gone tomorrow


^Made myself barf with that title, and yet it remains.


You heard it hear probably after my mom already told you first–I’m up the crack of the Pacific Northwest, living in Rainsville, USA/Bridge City/Stumptown/Brewtopia! It was a bumpy ride, my friends, but we’ve made it and we’re all so happy with our choices. *It is just me, when I say “we” I am being unnecessarily inclusive.

I say bumpy and I mean bumpy because in accordance with the unimpeachable laws of nature i.e. the plans that were made for me by no one but myself, I was meant to be in Hawaii right now! I told like 20 people! They were really counting on it!

To be frank, I just wasn’t ready for life in paradise and I don’t think it was quite ready for me; sure, you can regularly find sea turtles rolling in the waves at Paia Bay, avocados are the size of your face, rainbows appear over the West Maui mountaintops and clothing–and the entire concept of time–are optional, BUT ALL ANYONE WANTED TO DO WAS GO TO THE DAMN BEACH! The town only had 2 coffee shops! I lost my second best denim shirt at the airport!! (It also rained for a week straight and I couldn’t find a place to live. This gave me an utter meltdown some stress.) I was basically drafted by 2 sweet, sweet punk-rockers from Portland who were on vacation at the hostel I was calling home. A week later I flew into PDX International Airport.

Portland was love at first sight, from the creepy X-files pine trees to the combination laundromat/cafe that revived my sand-starched wardrobe. Everyone is a musician, every street has a food cart pod. Even a month later I STILL have not been to every coffee shop in this blissful metrop!

So here I will sit to catch my breath, let my bangs down and work towards my recently conceptualized life goal– a mobile, gypsy caravan-style thrift store I will someday run. *Which reminds me: if anyone’s sitting on an obnoxious collection of ruffled 80s-style blouses and/or tiny knick-knacks just rusting away, send ’em west.

I know this recap is slapdash and garbled so comment or message me with any burning questions!

And finally, my kindest and sincerest apologies go out to the country and continent of Australia–it is both, why not!–for serious neglect. Someday I will tell you all about the magic of Melbs as I witnessed that most perfect of cities, but that day is not today.

Love&Mercy, Brian Williams! -Xoxo from the small blue alien who is my ghostwriter